Flarf Poetry by Sam Langer

"Why This Is Important"

This often results in them losing the use of their hands for the rest of their lives.

Dear Apple,
Do you know the fastest way to replace awesome with a terrible knot in your
 stomach?
Here's the thing: you're Apple.
I want to continue to use and love the products you make,
because they're changing the world,
and have already changed my life.
Why?


"Australia Has The Most Carbon-Dense Forests In The World"

While direct extrapolation is not possible
the home of the most critical population of koalas in Australia is being logged.
Isn't this a good reason to subsidise logging native forests?

A Poem by Joe Bussiere

FROM "456"

snakes eat things, filmed

           apparently sodomized the leader

the last moments, drone for family

at taxis a Acapulco scapego   Pakistans

nose error don't dive              landing

my own nurses

                       my labort causing no goal

these cigarettes floating Atlantic

           the great cube, the Ka'aba

the summer the winter the equinoxen

molding metals           making shapes

           dressed in cloth          lifestyle

                                            -oriented

oriental largely temporary suspend several

support wide more intricate national call

            the main body oppose

            mono-lingual   briefly internal

            seer time member moot point

            doing anti- also          brutal variety

truly environmen                     where this point

                                              unit freed made

                                              form reme-

                                              mber bega-

                                              n the role th-

                                              e particul

                                                              ar fire org

nonliminal building                   s most suxual

coarse flux who           would  go       on

religious sex bickering             rejected emph

asis rejex        rejects              second people

important and non-important   most of its life

priviledge wheel          police car police sirens please

persp

ectives             intersexy most of fraction

                       older former concern attender never

                       who would in part under racing working

themselves between grand canyon demolition

                                 larger circles of pathizers

the pan sky      the subjective quantity of life

                        lie down econome

                        layers of well being layers of thinking

the planned sky what of all planned

           nothing unexpected, hydrogen

elements uranus pluto flying into space

car factory      detroit lady    come see

rhymes with drug store alas needs refrigeration

everything climate                  what corpus

makes it

easier to speak of       and      eat corpus

what digital prints you take soldier at war

                      the commander in chief coins

peppermint hibiscus parsley    billions federal

reservation of songs    when war songs

                                   are boring and the limes

                                   are rotten now and so cold

Fiction Dribble by N.T.

"College Romance #252"

His most reliable ex said he went from soft to orgasm in the span of the Friends opening titles. I had lunch with him for three days: he hugged me like a scarecrow, or an aunt. Karen from my semiotics class told me all my gay friends were fucking him.

Asemic Writing by N.T.

Poem by Scott Jardany Lewis

"I got the one I won and I won another one"


Bought one Snicker bar

opened it, won another one

so I got the one I won and I won another one

I don’t even like Snicker bars that much

I only bought the first one

because I was hungry and tired

and the vending machine

was right there

I asked an Asian lady tending a newsagent

after I handed over my Snicker wrapper

with Congratulations typed

on the inside

if I could get a Mars bar instead

of another Snicker bar

She said sure why not

with a facial expression

denoting

like why would you even ask that

they’re the same price?

Three Poems by Jordan Castro

LOVE OR TRUST NO ONE INCLUDING YOURSELF BUT DON'T FEEL BAD ABOUT IT JUST ACCEPT IT AS NECESSARY AND MOVE ON

no one is any less shitty than anyone else


people are selfish

you are a person


ok


REALLY BAD WITH MONEY

if money wasn't made to spend

then what was time made for?

THERE ARE CERTAIN GIRLS I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL WITH WHO I'D LIKE TO HAVE SEX WITH BUT WILL NEVER HAVE SEX WITH AND THOUGH THIS IS A DEVASTATING TRUTH I MUST ACCEPT IT AND MOVE ON

there are certain things that will never happen no matter how badly you want
 them to happen

because it isn't your decision

because it isn't my decision

because it isn't anyone's decision

but lucky for us...

(wait for it, wait for it)...

IT DOESN'T HAVE TO MATTER!!!!!!!!!!

IT DOESN'T HAVE TO MATTER!!!!!!!!!!

IT REALLY DOESN'T HAVE TO MATTER!!!!!!!!!!

I SWEAR!!!!!!!!!!

YOU AREN'T NEARLY AS IMPORTANT TO OTHER PEOPLE AS YOU
 ARE TO YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!

I SWEAR!!!!!!!!!!

(SO PLEASE, LETS) STOP BITCHING!!!!!!!!!!

YOU DON'T CONTROL THE EVENTS OF THE UNIVERSE AND NEITHER
 DO I AND NEITHER DOES ANYONE!!!!!!!!!!

BECAUSE YOU OR ME OR ANYONE AREN'T THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO
 EXIST – DESPITE WHAT WE'D LIKE TO BELIEVE!!!!!!!!!!

it's time to stop feeling sorry for ourselves and do something different for a change

BRAINSICK RIVER by Gary J. Shipley

Excerpt from SPOOK NUTRITION a novel-in-progress

Crashing from malware, silt of my head grown inverted in schemes clogged with disarrangements of arrested self-cognizance to end up at me, at anything flowing and held alone in the vessel drowning in that cosmetic destiny of catalogues, the sick in drainrays of my starved monkeys peeling grenades for their jacuzzi meat god, torn watching me clawed like dead spiders and cursed into rivers, chewed mingling in lotions embodied by those obscene miles pervaded by fingers, by length and sculptural scenes rotted and tremulous in hovels of pneumatic breeding, of perceptions crawled through with unvarnished glimpses, our facsimiles screaming, straining against the accident, against vacant lingering recollections of some dreamed disservice made sentient on the lips of garaged islands, where men with metal fingers and eyes of scorched tinfoil study abnormalities caught supervening on the earth, murderous cup-swap slimes bounded in hoax hair and industrial light, their sunken interiors exhumed riddled with ante-chambers and uranium, their crag bones chasms sucked from the insides of rodent genitals, from jaws cast open like cold mathematical puddings doused in spotted visions and grotesque ciphers for the sake of our trembling quackeries of substance, its gulping performers blooded in folded parking-lots, the bodies and cars mangled in ventriloquist postures, tortured rhetorical inside scratches that never complete, and in our gloomriverblackness fucked fat with eels we hang unaware dying beset and bearing the raconteur foam of eternity, the nightmare stealth of medical songs featuring rare impregnations, chemo marrow ripe with the green pissy seed of inorganic children, their dexterity of violations unique in damp diseased archways where red giggling impedes surprise and where we scrutinize our tenderized fingers curling like crayfish, our senses drenched enraptured by spikes and portraitures of evil above the wriggling gates of our invisible restraints, above seas adapted from decaying ceilings clad in panicked improvisations, limbs held down in human holes drunk on the pen of some instinctive transmission, and what I found was the voice in a fragment of trees and a vortex in the junkyard darkness where suction became a proclivity, and us so frenzied in ourselves, our corpses novelties, comprehensions of error, my teeth to attention, spun up on massacres, all my fidelities to old agonies scarred blushing, their topography drooling, our apotheosis forcing sunrises from rotting perfumes and epithets on hotel walls as we pray through nights practiced in doorways, hidden behind the new perverseness of strangers, all faces bolted to their disappearance under the glare of one common obstruction, and we run into the gleaming viscera of morning, birds sold into pacts of stillness suffering voiceless, the water running black like vermin, its unseen feet divining the profusion of robots, bared brains curdling in the sun its victims floating inside us, my intricacies far off clustered in flyspeck heads and analised curses that I can’t pronounce freely, stolen in intervals of wreckage and acid glimpses of its grazing ivy leeching sinews and bone, the evening doubt lighting our withered casements, our soil centres, our lungs dangling in asthma

Flarf Poetry by Jim Withington

HI JIM, THIS IS ALEX SUNDANCE

Hi Jim, this is Alex Sundance
boyfriend. I was just calling
about the chair of it, she said she could
have. I'm just gonna come over and
pick it up. I have my friend's car and
I could swing by and pick it up
anytime this afternoon
if that works for you
guys in your runs very busy

but you know.
So whatever is easiest,
just please give me a call.
My phone number is (XXX) 730-6140

thanks bye.


HI JIM, THIS IS SOME

Hi Jim, this is some
you know i key. For Your stable.
I want to take your Staples.

I miss you up on the and Section 417 again.
I said he'd on. Please call me back.

I'm very region for you. I know.
Great knowledge to tell you about.
If you wanna call okay we can meet each other.

Thank you, bye.

Three Texts by James Leo

1.

EU garlic
I-3 coffin
Meegan final
Ponzi Ponzi
TV
green DNA

lion recovery
we're dancing
kara chi
MED wud WoD

Indo chapter
agro acro
up terrorism
proverbial rain


2.

Nail the kingdom of faith published.
Why is not expensive or radical leadership?
Hooks and uncontrolled terrorism in order to grow, the Sun.
The blast.

Cheese tap duck!
The love is the feeling of the African continent, can reduce the Cooking.
Best friends.
The third business processes are being ignored.

CRI, soft focus.
No risk of sexually transmitted diseases despair.
Constitutional issues.
However, speaking from home.


3.

Frogs golf pencil for this nonsense. Hitler is a structure. Character
is not gay, if you do not need to do in the game. Genocide, Hitler
seriously?

Employees with disabilities will be closed. Sign genocide. Hitler
killed for food. Pipe end of your ass? Hitler referred to the
genocide.

If a bird is about Hitler? Have you heard of the drug, if the money?
Smoke rising from genocide, administrative waste, so Ren gun. How to
manage patients in the accident.

Hitler was able to explain the link? Hitler was impressed with the
weapon? Hitler killed and a long needle. Review of Hitler's pressure.
Do you think that the Holocaust and the murder of financial dragon?

Hitler's Holocaust. Music gloves Holocaust. Hitler led his group of
crack. Deleting a character is part of the poison in his career.
Hitler's Holocaust.

Flarf Poetry by Jim Withington

JIM I AM HAVING A GREAT DAY

Jim I am having a great day.
But I'm
very tired.
And And
trouble staying awake

I worked all day and I am so much want to do.

I don't know if it is, and I'm going to sleep okay bye
hello to live meeting right now,
benefit. We're putting on. But I don't know so I didn't know hello to let you know

I want to give you a quick but seems like a experienced it.
So they 5 falls convincing or maybe I will advancing with the holler.

I was in.
If you could.
Well, If nothing else,
I will see you before noon.
But I, but.

One way or another. Hello.

Place myself in your life the neck, you can.
Hello tomorrow. The Impact worship.
But. One of them.

If I help you put them in boxes orsomething.

I was. I don't wanna party.

I hope it will be there as well. But if I don't wake up. For putting is done, hello. We will be there in spirit, monthly. Because, putting on sleep.


HEY JIM SHERK

Hey Jim Sherk
just going to say hey
let you know what's going on. I mean.

Holly and my 2 buddies from Wisconsin.
Yes, sir, and we're gonna just got the pop alignments
want to leave the back door open for a if that's cool

wear black up the gates
the ridley's good.

He's got water everything should be good.
Many.
If you wanna stop in for any reason, or you need it.

You can call his phone
or on my phone and just
leave a message to the receptions
horrible and then I will keep checking it.

And then
If you are
stopping the Pops
and have a bear
with us up to you

otherwise the bacterial be open to reset. Yes.

If anything is changes and you need us like you come over night.
We will do what we have to do and Later, alright buddy.
So I'll talk to you want to talk to you.