Doublewordscore Poem by Zack Ford

"Love, Children, Dinosaurs, and Meteors"

It’s a hard knock life
For Virginia Woolf
The world will explode soon
Annie
The orphan we all love
Won't be mopping floors anymore
She'll be dead
The fucking apocalypse


Note from the curator: The "doublewordscore poem," termed by Zack Ford, is a particular type of poem that implements on-the-spot flarf sensibilities by taking three topics from a friend and then texting a poem based on those topics to that friend right at that moment.

Two New Poems by Zack Ford

“Meeting in the Elevator Pt. 1: Crossbreeding”

Coyote
Sacagawea
Elevator music
Love flows through the notes
Her feel
Shocking the coyote’s feel
If only he was human
Coyote thinks
If only this coyote wasn’t a creep
Sacagawea thinks
Beep
Fourteenth floor

“The Life & Times”

The elephant was on Ritalin
He was failing school
So Ms. Teacher Elephant said
Ritalin
That’s the answer
So momma elephant drugged up her son
So elephant started doing Ritalin
But it didn’t help
F’s
So he dropped out of school
Sold his Ritalin
Spent all his money on peanuts
5 years pass
Found dead in a gutter with shells littering his trunk
Good recommendation teacher elephant

Flarf Poetry by Zack Ford

“The Truth of Stories”

Pt. 1: Liar Liar Your Shell is on Fire

Tortoise

My friend tortoise

You didn’t win the race

You’re slow

And a liar

You try to be the one symbolizing morals

But all you symbolize is a lack of truth

And a sense of exaggeration

That rabbit kicked your ass

We all know the truth

Be ashamed

Pt. 2: Cheater with a Beard

Rumpelstiltskin

You think you’re all witty

But you’re also a liar

Your name isn’t Rumpelstiltskin

You imagined that name to screw with people’s minds

I saw your birth certificate

Your name is David

Dammit David

Pt. 3: Rabbit Holes and Blue Pipe Smoking Caterpillars

Hey Alice

You’re only a child

So get off the acid

It’s unsafe

“Creative Letdown”

Man, I’m so upset I didn’t invent the Muppets

I wake up every morning with such a deep furnace of anger that I didn’t create Cookie Monster

I could have invented Kermit

He’s only a frog made of a sock

I can do a Muppet-like voice

I mean my Muppet voice sounds like a steroid-raging Grover

But the kids could have gotten used to it

I mean

Dammit Jim Henson

Taking all the good ideas

Maybe I’ll take up shadow puppetry

Do you think celebrities will sing songs with a shadow puppet named Krause?